29.12.03
So here is the revised 24 Hours of 24 part Dos plan.
Item One: The marathon will begin at 11am on Tuesday, December 30th, in my living room.
Item Two: My mom is working from home on Tuesday until 6pm, so how's about we try and keep our voices down until she's off.
Item Three: The viewing of the episodes will last no less than 17 hours and 36 minutes, not factoring in time for breaks that will inevitably be necessary. The tentative time for conclusion of activities is 8 or 9 am.
Item Four: Bring something to share, i.e. food or beverages (caffeinated is preferable. Those bringing diet sodas will be shot on sight.)
Item Five: The prize for falling asleep during the marathon is a year's membership in the Douche of the Month club. I hear April is New Car Scent.
Item Six: There will be a mandatory break at 11pm, for Futurama and Family Guy. This is non-negotiable.
Item Seven: Wearing pajamas is encouraged. Unless you sleep naked, in which case for God's sake put some clothes on, Andy.
25.12.03
Sarah's Christmas Haul:
-White Trogdor shirt (with majesty!)
-Zippy hoodie
-Pajama pants
-DVDs: 24 Season 2, Complete Indiana Jones, Pirates of the Carribean, Chicago, X2, and The Princess Bride
-CDs: Whatever and Ever Amen and Naked Baby Photos
-Assorted socks and gloves
-New cover for my cell phone
-$50 Gap gift card
24.12.03
I think college prevented me from really getting into Christmas these last few years. When you're little you start counting the days down in September, and then early December the decorations go up and you feel Christmasy all month. At least that's how it was for me. Now, halfway through December, I barely take time enough out of cramming to realize what day it is. College finals ruined Christmas anticipation for me.
18.12.03
I'd like to report that all four TBAA bloggers attended the opening day of Return of the King. Sarah, Sarah, and Amanda all went to see the movie. I spent the day taking nonsmoking breaks with Mike and maintaining concessions. I worked Tues night/Wed morn when we had the 12:01AM shows. I only saw about three questionable die hard fans. Three preteen girls spent several hours at a cafe table in the lobby having a "RotK party at Crossroads." This included them making t-shirts and playing some sort of board game. They all had cloaks on and one girl even had some elf ears. On Wed morning I got to work at 10 only to find at least 100 people waiting outside to get in. I like to call these people "Lords of the Crazy." The line starter was a girl named Tiffany who used to work at the theater. She saw Fellowship at least 30 times in the theater. She of course was decked out in authentic wear, and I heard she got to the theater shortly after 8AM. She watched the 11AM showing we had, then had tickets for the consecutive showings that occured in that auditorium for the day. She was always a little stranger than most.
"So Jenny...when are you going to see the movie?" I will publically announce that I didn't like Fellowship so much and I haven't seen Two Towers. Maybe I'll watch them eventually. No one has sat me down and had me watch them since the attempt Chun made last Christmas.
I work next today so I will get to be around for day two aftermath of the movie. Then I'm off to sunny Florida and all my friends will have to make it through without me. Love you guys.
I know the movie is only two days away, but I couldn't help it. I've gotten all the information I can from the frame-by-frame analysis of the trailer, and I need more, dammit! Here now, from ew.com, "Five surprises"
SPOILER ALERT
The plot of December 17's ''The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King'' is hardly a secret -- Hobbit lovers first learned the ending of J.R.R. Tolkien's saga nearly 50 years ago. But it's a sign of the fervency of the ''Rings'' fan base, and of director Peter Jackson's seemingly boundless skills, that moviegoers are awaiting the final chapter as if the story were unfolding for the first time. And thanks to clever tweaking of the beloved books, some moments in the ''King'' movie will catch even fluent Elvish speakers with their swords down. (Tread carefully: SPOILERS -- though no giant spiders -- lurk ahead).
HOW PRECIOUS Andy Serkis gave ''The Two Towers''' most memorable performance (as demented, speech-impediment-suffering Ring seeker Gollum) without ever showing his face: The character was a computer-generated creation. But in ''Return of the King'' the first person (well, Hobbit) seen is Serkis, in the flesh. Decked out in a greasy wig and pallid makeup, Serkis portrays Gollum in the distant past, when he was an ordinary halfling named Smeagol. The film's opening scene shows how Smeagol first encountered the One Ring that will become his ''precious'' -- and why that was very bad news for his cousin Deagol.
MONSTER MASH Which is cooler: A giant man-eating spider or a horde of war-loving dead people? ''Return of the King'' viewers don't need to decide -- they get both. Early in the film (in a sequence the books place in part two, ''The Two Towers'') a treacherous Gollum leads Frodo (Elijah Wood) and Sam (Sean Astin) into the clutches of the gigantic arachnid known as Shelob -- whose fleshy presence is one of the trilogy's most stunning visual effects. Later, the movie expands upon the book's account of Aragorn (Viggo Mortensen) using an army of ghosts -- the Dead Men of Dunharrow, who owe a debt to his royal ancestors -- to defeat Sauron's wicked army. Expect Eddie Murphy to pull off a similar stunt in ''Haunted Mansion 2.''
GIRL POWER Even as he populated Middle Earth with Hobbits, Orcs, and Elves, there was one exotic creature Tolkien tended to neglect: women. But in ''The Return of the King,'' the brave Eowyn (Miranda Otto) is an essential figure, slaying the faceless, villainous Lord of the Nazgul. When the creature tells her that no man can harm him, she memorably replies, ''I am no man,'' before smiting him with her blade. Wisely, Jackson eschewed the book's considerably less snappy version of that dialogue: ''But no living man am I! You look upon a woman. Eowyn I am.'' A woman she may be, but talk like Yoda she does.
MAGIC AND LOSS In the book, the evil wizard Saruman (played by 81-year-old actor Christopher Lee in the movies) suffers an ignoble death after the forces of good reduce him to a beggar. But the movie has an even more undignified fate in store for the magician, leaving him out of the story altogether save for a throwaway line referring to his powerlessness. Jackson had originally filmed an opening for the film that included a new fate for Saruman -- meant to be more dramatic than the book's version -- but ultimately decided it was out of place. Lee's costar, Ian McKellan, says the veteran actor shouldn't be upset at being sliced out of the film, though: ''It will be there on the DVD, and people will be able to say to Peter, 'You should have put it into the movie!'''
WORLD WITHOUT END Unlike, say, ''The Matrix Revolutions,'' no one could accuse ''The Return of the King'' of ending abruptly. While the film avoids most of the book's lengthy epilogue (dropping a subplot about corruption in the Hobbits' Shire), it still offers an unusual number of false endings after the climactic battle is finished. Among the seeming finales are a wedding, a coronation, a return to the Shire, and a trip with the Elves away from Middle-Earth. All that's missing is an ''American Graffitti''/''Animal House''-style coda showing each character's future -- for that, you'll have to turn to Appendix A of Tolkien's novel. Really.
11.12.03
I'm in a bad mood. I'm in that mood where I have blinding flashes of rage for no apparent reasons. Actually, I have lots of reasons. I'm going to present them in a list of THINGS I HATE:
I hate when people say, 'ludicrous' when they mean, 'ridiculous.'
I hate when people say, 'comical' or 'humorous' when they mean, 'funny.' Do you think I'm impressed by your psudo-big words? Well, I'm not, asshole.
I hate when people name drop with impressive book titles. What the fuck do I care if you read The Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire cover to cover? Go to hell.
I hate when the book is supposed to be in the library and you go to find it and it's not fucking there. I mean, seriously.
I hate that my printer has taken to growling at me ever since I forcefully removed a piece of paper from it while it was still printing. Who owns who here? I'm going to rip that piece of crap a new one.
I hate every single stupid little step in the graduate school application process. I don't have time for this bullshit.
I'm actually feeling more angry now. Maybe I'll go punch a wall.
You know that oh-so hot scene in The Recruit where Colin's character kisses Bridget's character upside down in bed? If you don't, it's oh-so hot. And then he gets up and fixes breakfast. Yummy. I digress. It got me thinking about what I don't have: 1. Colin Farrell in my bed, 2. an awesome D.C. brownstone and 3. legs up to my armpits. So it got me thinking even more why four awesome chicks like us are still single, as of this post. If you'll indulge me, a quick mathematical analysis:
14, 343 (number of students at Appalachian)
- 2, 473 (number of freshmen)
----------
11, 870
÷ 2 (assuming 50/50 gender ratio)
----------
5, 935
÷ 3 (the remaining classes)
-----------
1,978
- 55% (dating, engaged, married [it feels more like 93%])
-----------
890
- 10% (gay)
------------
801
- 35% (smokers)
------------
520
- 15% (psycho/sociopath)
------------
442
- 20% (alcoholics, workaholics, commitment phobics, misogynists, megalomaniacs, chauvinists, emotional fuckwits or freeloaders, perverts)
------------
353
- 20% (tragically, indescribably, horrendously, unfortunately fugly)
------------
282
- 30% (complete dumbass, jackass, idiot or moron)
-------------
197
- 15% (miscellaneous)
-------------
167
Okay, that leaves a grand total of 167 college seniors guys who are reasonably normal. Why can't I meet one of these nice fellas and become a smug-dating/engaged/married? Wait, don't answer that.
Well, it's exam season again. That means it's time to bring back one of the least popular TBAA features: EXAM STRESS REDUCTION TIPS!
1. Take a large stack of Playboys to the library. Say to anyone who will listen, "Time to study for ANATOMY! Eh? Eh? GET IT???"
2. Buy a cheap Polaroid camera. Walk around the library taking pictures of people, and ask them to sign the bottom. Put them in a large envelope labeled "Stolen Souls." Snicker constantly.
3. Sit for an exam in a large lecture class you're not taking. Scribble furiously in the blue book for 15 minutes, then scream and fall to the floor. Curl up in the fetal position and sob.
4. Build a fort out of bedsheets in the study lounge/common area. Attempt to conquer and annex all of the couches and desks, negotiate treaties if necessary.
5. Drink.
9.12.03
Chris: i have to get up early to take my paper to school
Chris: like 10am!!
Jenny: man. that is some kind of early
Chris: i know it
Chris: its just ridiculous
Chris: before the crack of dawg
Chris: dawn
Chris: crap, i'm too hip
Chris: i've finally reached the level of Too Hip
In other news, I've been nursing a spider bite for the past few days. Needless to say, spiders are crotchety little bastards and I just want it to go away. I've been in total agony through this ordeal.
4.12.03
I haven't felt much like posting lately. Been a rough couple weeks. My grandma and my cat, both on the same day, what the hell is that? Not fair.
Ugh. I finally finished this godforsaken paper for Persuasion. My thesis: The trend of celebrities substituting traditional models for cosmetic advertising campaigns. Sweet Jesus. After three months of procrastination, a nap between 5 a.m. and 10 a.m. and many, many viewings of the Troy trailer, I can now relax and stress about my next paper.
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